Don’t Leave Before you Clean!

So as parents we are supposed to teach our kiddos how to be decent human beings. We start young with how not to color on tables and walls. Then we graduate to things like don’t chew with your mouth open, and clean up your mess. 
One thing I’ve seen that drives me nuts is when my kiddos go to someone’s house and makes a mess. Being a mom of tiny humans has given me a certain level of knowledge in the cleaning up messes department. And it’s not my fav. I also can’t even deal with other kids in my house making messes, IF their parents leave without making them clean it up. 

Let me elaborate. 

1. This is my family’s home. The location of my happiness, my bubble, my mess. MINE. Not yours. MINE. So.. when I spend all day cleaning up after my own kiddos and their room is all shiny and clean, I’m not at all interested in cleaning up all the toys left behind from your kiddos hanging out. I have enough messes to clean. That means, that if the toy box wasn’t upside down and the toys weren’t spilled out all over when you got here… Then it’s good mom etiquette to make sure it isn’t when you leave. 

2. My kids will HAVE to clean up messes at your house. Period. They destroy it, they clean it. It’s all about respecting someone else’s property. Not to mention as I have before, I know what it’s like to clean all day. Everyday. I’m pretty sure that I will be cleaning for all of eternity.  Also sure I didn’t sign up for that on paper anywhere… Unless they gave me paperwork during labor I didn’t read, in which case read your stuff ladies. Ha. But seriously, I want my kids to respect other people’s property. I want them to go to other people’s houses as a grown up and help clean dishes after dinner. I want them to not break their friends stuff. I want them to just be decent human beings. 

3. It’s not fair.  Pretty sure if I came to your house and started throwing your stuff around the living room and then bounced you’d be pretty upset. The same goes for ours kiddos. My daughter takes 7 days and 7 nights to clean her room. I can’t ask her to clean a mess she had help making. Well I could but that’s not really fair… Or is it? No. No. See now I’m giving myself ideas. If I ask my daughter to clean her room after several children have been in there making a mess, it will lead to disaster. I will definitely end up yelling. So again. Not fair. 

4. I also understand that toddlers won’t clean up their mess. That’s where you come in. Being a mom means having to clean up their mess. Even if that means at my house. Same goes for me. Like I mentioned before it’s good mom etiquette. 

It’s all for a good cause I swear. I want my children to be responsible for their actions. I want them to grow into decent human beings. If this is only one step in the right direction… Then let’s start here. 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

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photo credit: Dean Terry <a href=”″>Cleaning Day?</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

Mom Friends. 

I don’t know about y’all, but making friends with other moms is hard. What if they raise their kids different? What if I slip up and cuss in front of their kiddos? What if they think I’m a terrible person? 

Truth is. That sh*t don’t matter. Yes. That is right. It DOESN’T matter. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.  

I’m sitting at the ball field. My daughter is playing baseball.. not very well I might add.. but that’s​ ok. She’s six.  I am sitting in my truck. Now before you think the worst, I’m only sitting in my truck because it’s better than sitting on the nasty wet grass or the concrete slab the other moms are currently sitting on. BUT, if there were chairs… I’d still be in my truck. I can see my daughter and she can see me. So truck seat it is. 

This year I only know one mom. One. So that puts me in the awkward position to make small talk with other moms I don’t know. What do I talk about? Why do I say? Now, you would think that we have something to talk about because we have children who are on the same team. But no. My anxiety level sky-rockets into Galaxy mode when I’m around other moms. I have no idea why. I forget how to put words into sentences and I’m always afraid I’m going to sound like an idiot. So I like my safe zone in the truck.

Anxiety, well it sucks. I could be missing out on some pretty good friends. Hell, it took me one whole school year and half another one before I actually gave in and met my daughter’s best friend’s​ mom at the park. Then she turned out to be one of my best friends. 

Still, it’s not easy for moms to meet other moms. We have a hard time. But, it doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t try. I don’t always have the guts to say hi first. Then I realized that I may not be the only one who has a hard time. I mean, I can’t possibly be the only mom who has anxiety about meeting other people. Right?

It’s doesn’t matter what you think. Those moms have bad days too. Those moms have kids with temper tantrums, say cuss words ( maybe not at the frequency that I do), and have a hard time making mom friends too. So don’t worry about what you “think” they might say. Go say hello. Try to talk to someone. Now, I’m not saying everytime… because come on.. I’m sitting in my truck. But, who knows what friends are passing you by. 

And if it turns out that those moms really do care about how you raise your kids, the clothes you wear or the personality you present, move on. You can be civil without being hateful. It’s called being a grown up. And I hope my kids do the same when they are grown.

Hugs- Kuddos and Kiddos

photo credit: Jim Bauer <a href=”″>Just Around the Corner</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

photo credit: IamNotUnique <a href=”″>house</a&gt; via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

I’m over the bad mom thing. Over it.

So do you remember that day last week when the dishes were piled up? That day when you spilt the drink on your laptop? That day when your kiddo said “mom” 3,789,456 times? The day when you felt like you failed as a mother because you screamed at your toddler for coloring on the wall? The day you thought would never end and how you just wished for bedtime? 

What about the day that you fought your kiddos to get in the car, dropped your coffee in the driveway all over your purse, and then drove to the store only to realize that your child took off their shoes before you left the house? What about the woman who sneered at you from her shopping cart in that how dare she make that baby walk around this place without shoes look?

What about the time you tried to get your child to leave the park and she threw herself in the sand box kicking and screaming? Then you had to drag her out like a football carrying all your crap in front of twenty other parents silently judging you?

As mom’s we are entitled to a bad day. What we are not entitled to, is making another mom feel terrible because she is having a bad day. Bad days happen. Sometimes they happen more often than not. And I’m sick of seeing other moms belittle another for their bad day mistakes. I can’t even begin to tell you the kinds of things that have happened to me on my bad days. Does it make me a terrible mother? No.  Does it make me less of a mother? No it doesn’t. 

For some reason though, in the eyes of other moms and sometimes dads, you don’t make the cut in the parenting world. 

This world is big enough for all kinds of parents. There’s no reason to belittle someone because of a bad day. You dont  know what kind of battles they are fighting. You have no idea if they were up all night because their child is sick. You have no idea what kind of messed up situation they are in. You don’t know how tired they are. Or how over it they might be.

All I know is that the next time I’m at the store and I see a mom struggling, my go to thought won’t be ” what a terrible mother”. And all too often we moms have a lot to say on the matter. Me included. Enough is enough. Close your mouth. Keep it to yourself. There should never be a reason that a great mom should feel like a bad one. There should never be a situation where a mom rethinks her role as a mother because of something a stranger did or said. 

There should also never be a situation where family or friends have something to say on the matter either. Do you have kids? No? Then close your mouth. You have no idea what parenting is like until you actually have kids and parent.

Instead of speaking your mind about something you don’t know about, start saying things you do know. Like You’re doing a great job mom”  and “Dont worry we have all had bad days” .

Be kind. Always be kind. This world will fall to pieces if we can’t lead by example for our children. Show them we are not just a bunch of cranky old woman with kids. Say something nice. Put a smile on their face. Make someone’s day. Don’t forget about dads either! Everyone is entitled to their bad day. 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

Sickness Means More Cleaning

So the tiny kiddo is sick again. Pneumonia this time. She is absolutely miserable! After spending the day at the doctor, I have come home to a messy house and I am ready to tear it apart and kill germs. As a mom, I know where the obvious places are. Door knobs, light switches, bathrooms, I mean we moms know how to kill those germs.

What about the places you don’t think about though? The places that they hide stuff. The places they wipe their….Yes I’m going to say it…Boogers. What about the tiny little crumbs inside that cute little recliner you bought for their room? The tiny little plastic tea cups they drool all over during ‘tea time’.  The gum. Yes gum that they stuck to the bottom of their bed?  The sticky hot mess of drinks that were spilt in the car seat cup holders. 

I’ve talked about places to clean before, but I can’t help but find new places everytime I clean. New germ ridden locations in my house that I didn’t think about. It’s exhausting. Mentally and emotionally. If someone had told me being a mom meant finding questionable gunk hiding in random places all over my house for all eternity I may have reconsidered the mom job. Maybe. Probably not. 

Who am I kidding… I love my kiddos.  I want to make sure they are healthy and safe so when sickness plagues my household I go all out. The toothbrushes get replaced. The bedding gets washed. The walls get wiped down. The fake makeup gets thrown in the trash.  I supply myself with essential oils and antibacterials and go crazy. 

Stuffed animals get the sauna treatment in the dryer. The plastic stuff gets ran through the dishwasher​. I figure out what walls in my house need a new coat of paint and which ones just need a wipe down. 

 I’m hoping that my little one starts getting better soon. I don’t want both my kiddos sick. I also don’t want the ‘man flu’ to make an appearance. Nobody wants that hot mess!

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

Take care of yourself!

I have been sitting here in my quiet house, on a Friday night for an hour now.  Husband is working late. The tv is playing but I’m not really watching. I’m sewing on my machine​. Listening to the thunderstorms and enjoying the quiet. These nights come so few but I can’t help wishing I had something exciting to do. I’m bored of the same old “mom life” stuff. The laundry, the dishes, the cleaning, and the fighting with tiny humans to go to bed. I love to sew, and it’s relaxing but I’m burnt out on the repitition that is my life. Everyday, same old stuff. 

Since when did being a mom, mean not being able to have some fun? Since when does that mean that we are automatically home on the weekends and can’t let our hair down? It doesn’t. I want fun, romance, and adult conversation. I want hot dinner I don’t have to clean up and a movie that isn’t interupted by fighting kiddos. Hell, I’d settle for a long hot shower without children banging on the door. 

I can’t tell you the last time that I went to a store and bought something special for myself. I can tell you what I bought my girls, my husband, but not me. I’m sure there are moms that relate. I can’t remember the last time I went on a date with my husband. There used to be so many dinners and movies. Now it’s like we use the “we have kids” excuse too much. We do have kids, but that doesn’t mean we can’t go to dinner. It doesn’t mean that we can’t make time to keep the spark in our relationship lit. 

You can’t take care of your children, unless you take care of yourself. You can’t. So when you need a minute… Call up a friend, go to movie, go buy a milkshake. Find the time to take care of yourself. Kiss your husband, go to dinner and find time! Its important to not get “bored” or “burnt out”. I can’t be the best mom I can be without taking moments for myself to breathe and reflect on the stuff going on in my life. 

So tonight I’m going to enjoy this quiet house and this glass of wine. But tomorrow.. tomorrow my husband is taking me out for steak. He doesn’t know yet, so let’s not ruin the suprise! 

Hugs! -Kuddos and Kiddos

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photo credit: Derek Keats <a href=”″>Ligntning over Johannesburg, South Africa.</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

Weaning off the Pacifier

So as a mom of four gorgeous children I have had my share of ups and downs. The weaning from the bottle and the co-sleeping and the late night cries … The list goes on. But one of the things I found fairly easy was taking away my kids pacifiers. 

No matter what you call it, a binky, paci, plug, tiny baby silencer, again the list goes on, every child is different. It takes patience, love and a little hidden frustration. It also sometimes takes wine. For you, not the kiddo. It’s hard! You will want to give in! I can’t count on one hand how many times I just avoided taking it away out of fear of losing my sanity. It will be ok and you will survive! So will your little one.

So one thing to remember, your tiny bundle of love has probably had that little darling silencer in her mouth her or his whole life. It’s apart of them! I don’t know about you but if someone tried to take something I’ve had my whole life away I’d be pretty ticked about it.  The trick is to try and do it very slowly, or very quickly! It really depends on your little kiddo. 

Mine was easy. I took that little Paci out of her mouth and walked it to the trash. Then I had about four days of crying and rocking her at bedtime and she was over it. It wasn’t​ all rainbows and sunshine but it was totally worth it! 

If you are stuck with a child who won’t be that easy to wean, my advice is to do a little at a time. Take the pacifier away as soon as they wake up. Don’t mention it at all and ignore their cries and screams for ‘paci’ or ‘binky’. You can also try making the pacifier “taste bad” where they won’t want to put it in their mouth. My pediatrician recommended that I ask the pharmacist for something safe but bad tasting to put on the Paci. I never had to ask but it’s worth a shot!  

 During naptime try something else. Try going for a drive or cuddling on the couch. It’s always different with each kiddo, but after awhile they will forget all about the pacifier. I used to let mine stay awake all day the first couple days of taking the pacifier and bottle away. Keeping them from napping meant they were extra tired at bedtime and would fall asleep faster. 

When it’s bedtime.. Put them to bed without it. Start a routine, if you don’t already have one. Then they will know what to expect. Read stories, rock them, whatever that you feel will help calm your child. Mine liked baths. Then we would read and then she would get tucked in with one of two stuffed animals. 

If after awhile, they seem to not want to go to sleep without it, let them have it. I mean after all they are our bundles of joy and we can’t stand seeing them cry. I would go into my kiddos room and take it from her after she fell asleep. That way it wasn’t there to tempt her in the morning. 

No matter what happens, remember that this is just one phase in life! It will be gone before you know it. Just try to have patience. It’s​ hard I know. I wanted to bang my head on a wall listening to my kids cry about things. I still do sometimes. But, unfortunately, we are the keeper of Cheerios, and the hard decisions. 

When they aren’t 15 in high school with a pacifier I’m sure they will thank us.. Maybe not, but here’s hoping!

Hugs- Kuddos and Kiddos
photo credit: jim.choate59 <a href=”″>Someone Somewhere is Crying</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

We Have a Trickster in the House

So my toddler is becoming a real pro at tricking me. She’s slick. One of the things that she has recently got me with is naptime. She acts tired like she might lay down and then BAM. She’s bouncing around like somebody gave her a bag of Skittles. Hopefully nobody hid a bag in her room. I should probably check. I have some sketchy friends. Seriously though she is a real trickster.

Today I tried laying down with her in my bed. I tried that ‘fake sleep’ trick. I tucked her in and got her comfy and then laid perfectly still. She kissed me a couple of times, tried to pry my eyes open with her tiny fingers and even played with her toes awhile. 

Now here’s where the trick part comes into play. I’m not exactly sure when she fell asleep. I’m not sure when she finally got comfortable enough, or tired enough to give in. I’m not even sure if she was covered with a blanket or not because three hours later we were both waking up to my phone ringing. Yes I slept three whole hours. See what a trickster she is? I didn’t even know I was tired! 

Man did that nap feel amazing though.

She’s been on a roll lately. Figures that me trying to trick her  would backfire. 

Another event this week was the ‘cookie grab and ditch’. She kept asking me for cookies. I was also indulging on a few so how could I say no right? Well, I kept giving her cookies and she would disappear in her room with them. A few minutes later, she would come back for another one. I assumed she was eating them. Until I went to put laundry away in her room the next day and found them in her bottom dresser drawer. Haha. Kids. 

She also likes to hide behind my big living room curtains after she has done something she shouldn’t. I will almost always find a big mess, colored wall or knocked over mop bucket if she’s behind the curtain. Yesterday it was paperclips. All the paperclips had been dumped into the toilet. This is in the 5 minutes that it took me to switch the laundry around. Sigh.

I don’t remember being this clever at a young age. I have high hopes for this one. 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

photo credit: C. P. Ewing <a href=”″>Monarch Butterfly</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

Cookie Crumbs

So has anybody ever noticed that if you give a toddler a cookie it ends up in places they didn’t even take the cookie? How does that happen? How do they get tiny little crumbs all over places they didn’t even go near? Is it magic? Does the dog do it? Do the cookie particles move themselves? Seriously, what gives?

 I gave my toddler a cookie today. She took it in the living room. When I got into the living room to sit down there were crumbs on the chair, the floor and the back of the couch. She got cookie crumbs on the lampshade, that I’m pretty sure she never touched. 

She took it in the bedroom. There were crumbs on the floor the bed and on her favorite baby doll. She even managed to get crumbs on the remote. That she can’t even reach. Because it is high on her dresser.  So she either climbed up the dresser and I’m a terrible mother who doesn’t pay attention, or she threw her cookie crumbs up there. I mean, how in the heck did they get up there? I never saw her put them there. Her fingers can barely grab the top of the dresser. Ugh. Anywho…

She took the cookie into the bathroom. I obviously told her to get out of the bathroom.. but I had to clean up crumbs. They were on the floor and the side of the tub. Smashed into the rug, you name it. 

She took that same cookie into my room. She climbed on my bed and demanded the tv be put on. I got her off the bed and turned the tv on in the living room. Then guess what happened. Yup. I cleaned up cookie crumbs.  They were on the bed, the floor and on the desk. 

She ended up eating two more cookies. My life today was cookie crumbs. Also, when I went to get into bed tonight I had cookie crumbs in between the blankets.  She didn’t even get in between the blankets. 

Someone tell me how they do that! 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

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