As mom’s and wives we have a certain level of tolerance when it comes to things that our family in the household do on a daily basis.
We clean up everyone’s crap without batting an eyelash, and with little to no sleep. We cater to every tiny thing without so much as smudging our non-existent make-up. We stay up late and wake up early. We have been peed on, puked on and had food in our hair. We have been overwhelmed and down right EXHAUSTED.
So for the love of donuts stop doing things to anger the momster. You know our pet peeves, most of them, so stop. Just stop it.
Stop leaving your shoes in the middle of the living room floor. We cleaned that room forty times today. We will have to clean it forty more times before the kiddos go to bed. We are not going to be of any help at all, when we get up to comfort kiddos who have nightmares, and we fall over your crap and break a leg. So pick up your crap sir.
Stop leaving the cap off the toothpaste. I realize this is such a tiny thing, but nobody wants to brush their teeth with dried out mint. If that was the case we would grow a mint plant. So take two seconds and put the cap on. Do it. Did you forget? Go. Go now.
Let’s talk about coffee spoons. It goes in the dang sink. Or even better, the dishwasher. You know that expensive piece of equipment that y’all buy us Moms to “help” us. The one nobody knows how to use but us? Also, stop dipping that spoon into the sugar. Stop it. You clump the sugar up. It’s annoying.
Stop leaving the toilet seat up. We don’t want our tired butts hitting freezing cold water at 3am. The baby is awake for the third night in a row and I get it you don’t hear them like we do. It’s amazing what kind of super sonic hearing moms have. But, when we get up to pee before we tackle another hour long adventure with our bundle of joy, it would be nice not to fall in the toilet. Stop it. Seriously.
Stop leaving your hair in the sink. Look we get it. Men want to do the minimum amount of cleaning possible. After you’ve been with someone awhile there are just certain things we figure out about you guys. But how would you like it if we shaved our legs and umm, other areas, over the sink you brush your teeth in? I realize it’s just facial hair boys… but when you lean down to brush your teeth and your staring at tiny little hairs… well, clean that crap up.
Change the stinking toilet paper roll! If you finish using the toilet paper, throw on another one. Chances are we have lived in the same house together long enough for you to know where we keep the new rolls. So don’t take the new roll out of the cabinet, use it and then set it on the sink. It goes on the holder. Thank you.
Stop leaving your laundry on the floor, NEXT to the hamper. We pick up things off the floor from sun up to sun down. We don’t want to pick up after you too. Not really. So if you can’t take that extra step towards adulthood and helpfulness (I say that with the most pleasant voice ever) and pick up your stinking clothes and put them in the basket RIGHT in front of you, so help me…
The things we go through everyday to make sure the household runs smoothly are interrupted momentarily by the little things that you wouldn’t think twice about. I can’t tell you enough how many times a week I sigh from these little pesky things. I’m sure you dads have pet peeves too. Our hair on the shower stall, all of our crap on the sink, along with countless others. But we clean up the house everyday. WE do. Help us out man.
-Kuddos and Kiddos
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