Birthday Gifts

How many times as a parent have you been to a birthday party? How many times have you thrown a birthday party? So now, how many times, have you had to use the strength of Hulk to open the gifts that your little ones received at the birthday party? ME TOO.

I hate birthday parties. They make me feel like I’m trapped in a lion’s den, watching and waiting for the inevitable pouncing that will come from the cubs. The parents are awkward, the children are loud and jacked up on sugar. There’s a stench of sweat and birthday candles in the air. And there’s that weird moment right before they sing happy birthday where everyone waits to see who will sing first. (It’s usually me, being the singer in the family.) Somehow though, I always manage to make it through one.

So, recently my daughter had her 8th birthday. I’ll pause here a moment for a dramatic effect because for some reason my child will not stop growing even though I have insisted for 8 years that she do so.. kids never listen. Anyways back to the point, my daughter is 8. It started out seemingly like I was going to invite the family and have a cake and blah, blah blah… So we set a date and invited her friends.

Now how many of you have helped you child open the gifts when the party is over? Have you ever noticed that toys nowadays are locked up tight like Fort Knox?I can’t be the only one. It takes 5 seconds to rip that paper off but then it takes 20 minutes to get it out of the package. It’s ridiculous!!!

Who in their right mind wants to listen to a child complain about how long it is taking for the box to be opened? NO ONE.

My daughter received a baby doll for her Birthday. I had to cut tape off the box. I had to cut plastic off the dolls boots at an incredibly awkward angle. I had to cut teeny tiny little threads off her hair in order to get the plastic out of it. I mean, what gives!? Why does it take twice as long to open the toy? Is the doll going to come to life and stab me in the face? Do I need to lock up my jewelry so it doesn’t disappear in the night? And if the doll does come to life, why isn’t she doing my dishes?!?

I hope that the toy companies learn how to package their stuff soon. This Mama is not interested in opening one of those again anytime soon…

Thanks for Reading!
Kuddos and Kiddos

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