I’m over the bad mom thing. Over it.

So do you remember that day last week when the dishes were piled up? That day when you spilt the drink on your laptop? That day when your kiddo said “mom” 3,789,456 times? The day when you felt like you failed as a mother because you screamed at your toddler for coloring on the wall? The day you thought would never end and how you just wished for bedtime? 

What about the day that you fought your kiddos to get in the car, dropped your coffee in the driveway all over your purse, and then drove to the store only to realize that your child took off their shoes before you left the house? What about the woman who sneered at you from her shopping cart in that how dare she make that baby walk around this place without shoes look?

What about the time you tried to get your child to leave the park and she threw herself in the sand box kicking and screaming? Then you had to drag her out like a football carrying all your crap in front of twenty other parents silently judging you?

As mom’s we are entitled to a bad day. What we are not entitled to, is making another mom feel terrible because she is having a bad day. Bad days happen. Sometimes they happen more often than not. And I’m sick of seeing other moms belittle another for their bad day mistakes. I can’t even begin to tell you the kinds of things that have happened to me on my bad days. Does it make me a terrible mother? No.  Does it make me less of a mother? No it doesn’t. 

For some reason though, in the eyes of other moms and sometimes dads, you don’t make the cut in the parenting world. 

This world is big enough for all kinds of parents. There’s no reason to belittle someone because of a bad day. You dont  know what kind of battles they are fighting. You have no idea if they were up all night because their child is sick. You have no idea what kind of messed up situation they are in. You don’t know how tired they are. Or how over it they might be.

All I know is that the next time I’m at the store and I see a mom struggling, my go to thought won’t be ” what a terrible mother”. And all too often we moms have a lot to say on the matter. Me included. Enough is enough. Close your mouth. Keep it to yourself. There should never be a reason that a great mom should feel like a bad one. There should never be a situation where a mom rethinks her role as a mother because of something a stranger did or said. 

There should also never be a situation where family or friends have something to say on the matter either. Do you have kids? No? Then close your mouth. You have no idea what parenting is like until you actually have kids and parent.

Instead of speaking your mind about something you don’t know about, start saying things you do know. Like You’re doing a great job mom”  and “Dont worry we have all had bad days” .

Be kind. Always be kind. This world will fall to pieces if we can’t lead by example for our children. Show them we are not just a bunch of cranky old woman with kids. Say something nice. Put a smile on their face. Make someone’s day. Don’t forget about dads either! Everyone is entitled to their bad day. 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

Sickness Means More Cleaning

So the tiny kiddo is sick again. Pneumonia this time. She is absolutely miserable! After spending the day at the doctor, I have come home to a messy house and I am ready to tear it apart and kill germs. As a mom, I know where the obvious places are. Door knobs, light switches, bathrooms, I mean we moms know how to kill those germs.

What about the places you don’t think about though? The places that they hide stuff. The places they wipe their….Yes I’m going to say it…Boogers. What about the tiny little crumbs inside that cute little recliner you bought for their room? The tiny little plastic tea cups they drool all over during ‘tea time’.  The gum. Yes gum that they stuck to the bottom of their bed?  The sticky hot mess of drinks that were spilt in the car seat cup holders. 

I’ve talked about places to clean before, but I can’t help but find new places everytime I clean. New germ ridden locations in my house that I didn’t think about. It’s exhausting. Mentally and emotionally. If someone had told me being a mom meant finding questionable gunk hiding in random places all over my house for all eternity I may have reconsidered the mom job. Maybe. Probably not. 

Who am I kidding… I love my kiddos.  I want to make sure they are healthy and safe so when sickness plagues my household I go all out. The toothbrushes get replaced. The bedding gets washed. The walls get wiped down. The fake makeup gets thrown in the trash.  I supply myself with essential oils and antibacterials and go crazy. 

Stuffed animals get the sauna treatment in the dryer. The plastic stuff gets ran through the dishwasher​. I figure out what walls in my house need a new coat of paint and which ones just need a wipe down. 

 I’m hoping that my little one starts getting better soon. I don’t want both my kiddos sick. I also don’t want the ‘man flu’ to make an appearance. Nobody wants that hot mess!

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

Take care of yourself!

I have been sitting here in my quiet house, on a Friday night for an hour now.  Husband is working late. The tv is playing but I’m not really watching. I’m sewing on my machine​. Listening to the thunderstorms and enjoying the quiet. These nights come so few but I can’t help wishing I had something exciting to do. I’m bored of the same old “mom life” stuff. The laundry, the dishes, the cleaning, and the fighting with tiny humans to go to bed. I love to sew, and it’s relaxing but I’m burnt out on the repitition that is my life. Everyday, same old stuff. 

Since when did being a mom, mean not being able to have some fun? Since when does that mean that we are automatically home on the weekends and can’t let our hair down? It doesn’t. I want fun, romance, and adult conversation. I want hot dinner I don’t have to clean up and a movie that isn’t interupted by fighting kiddos. Hell, I’d settle for a long hot shower without children banging on the door. 

I can’t tell you the last time that I went to a store and bought something special for myself. I can tell you what I bought my girls, my husband, but not me. I’m sure there are moms that relate. I can’t remember the last time I went on a date with my husband. There used to be so many dinners and movies. Now it’s like we use the “we have kids” excuse too much. We do have kids, but that doesn’t mean we can’t go to dinner. It doesn’t mean that we can’t make time to keep the spark in our relationship lit. 

You can’t take care of your children, unless you take care of yourself. You can’t. So when you need a minute… Call up a friend, go to movie, go buy a milkshake. Find the time to take care of yourself. Kiss your husband, go to dinner and find time! Its important to not get “bored” or “burnt out”. I can’t be the best mom I can be without taking moments for myself to breathe and reflect on the stuff going on in my life. 

So tonight I’m going to enjoy this quiet house and this glass of wine. But tomorrow.. tomorrow my husband is taking me out for steak. He doesn’t know yet, so let’s not ruin the suprise! 

Hugs! -Kuddos and Kiddos

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Weaning off the Pacifier

So as a mom of four gorgeous children I have had my share of ups and downs. The weaning from the bottle and the co-sleeping and the late night cries … The list goes on. But one of the things I found fairly easy was taking away my kids pacifiers. 

No matter what you call it, a binky, paci, plug, tiny baby silencer, again the list goes on, every child is different. It takes patience, love and a little hidden frustration. It also sometimes takes wine. For you, not the kiddo. It’s hard! You will want to give in! I can’t count on one hand how many times I just avoided taking it away out of fear of losing my sanity. It will be ok and you will survive! So will your little one.

So one thing to remember, your tiny bundle of love has probably had that little darling silencer in her mouth her or his whole life. It’s apart of them! I don’t know about you but if someone tried to take something I’ve had my whole life away I’d be pretty ticked about it.  The trick is to try and do it very slowly, or very quickly! It really depends on your little kiddo. 

Mine was easy. I took that little Paci out of her mouth and walked it to the trash. Then I had about four days of crying and rocking her at bedtime and she was over it. It wasn’t​ all rainbows and sunshine but it was totally worth it! 

If you are stuck with a child who won’t be that easy to wean, my advice is to do a little at a time. Take the pacifier away as soon as they wake up. Don’t mention it at all and ignore their cries and screams for ‘paci’ or ‘binky’. You can also try making the pacifier “taste bad” where they won’t want to put it in their mouth. My pediatrician recommended that I ask the pharmacist for something safe but bad tasting to put on the Paci. I never had to ask but it’s worth a shot!  

 During naptime try something else. Try going for a drive or cuddling on the couch. It’s always different with each kiddo, but after awhile they will forget all about the pacifier. I used to let mine stay awake all day the first couple days of taking the pacifier and bottle away. Keeping them from napping meant they were extra tired at bedtime and would fall asleep faster. 

When it’s bedtime.. Put them to bed without it. Start a routine, if you don’t already have one. Then they will know what to expect. Read stories, rock them, whatever that you feel will help calm your child. Mine liked baths. Then we would read and then she would get tucked in with one of two stuffed animals. 

If after awhile, they seem to not want to go to sleep without it, let them have it. I mean after all they are our bundles of joy and we can’t stand seeing them cry. I would go into my kiddos room and take it from her after she fell asleep. That way it wasn’t there to tempt her in the morning. 

No matter what happens, remember that this is just one phase in life! It will be gone before you know it. Just try to have patience. It’s​ hard I know. I wanted to bang my head on a wall listening to my kids cry about things. I still do sometimes. But, unfortunately, we are the keeper of Cheerios, and the hard decisions. 

When they aren’t 15 in high school with a pacifier I’m sure they will thank us.. Maybe not, but here’s hoping!

Hugs- Kuddos and Kiddos
photo credit: jim.choate59 <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/137864562@N06/27065404724″>Someone Somewhere is Crying</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

We Have a Trickster in the House

So my toddler is becoming a real pro at tricking me. She’s slick. One of the things that she has recently got me with is naptime. She acts tired like she might lay down and then BAM. She’s bouncing around like somebody gave her a bag of Skittles. Hopefully nobody hid a bag in her room. I should probably check. I have some sketchy friends. Seriously though she is a real trickster.

Today I tried laying down with her in my bed. I tried that ‘fake sleep’ trick. I tucked her in and got her comfy and then laid perfectly still. She kissed me a couple of times, tried to pry my eyes open with her tiny fingers and even played with her toes awhile. 

Now here’s where the trick part comes into play. I’m not exactly sure when she fell asleep. I’m not sure when she finally got comfortable enough, or tired enough to give in. I’m not even sure if she was covered with a blanket or not because three hours later we were both waking up to my phone ringing. Yes I slept three whole hours. See what a trickster she is? I didn’t even know I was tired! 

Man did that nap feel amazing though.

She’s been on a roll lately. Figures that me trying to trick her  would backfire. 

Another event this week was the ‘cookie grab and ditch’. She kept asking me for cookies. I was also indulging on a few so how could I say no right? Well, I kept giving her cookies and she would disappear in her room with them. A few minutes later, she would come back for another one. I assumed she was eating them. Until I went to put laundry away in her room the next day and found them in her bottom dresser drawer. Haha. Kids. 

She also likes to hide behind my big living room curtains after she has done something she shouldn’t. I will almost always find a big mess, colored wall or knocked over mop bucket if she’s behind the curtain. Yesterday it was paperclips. All the paperclips had been dumped into the toilet. This is in the 5 minutes that it took me to switch the laundry around. Sigh.

I don’t remember being this clever at a young age. I have high hopes for this one. 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

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Cookie Crumbs

So has anybody ever noticed that if you give a toddler a cookie it ends up in places they didn’t even take the cookie? How does that happen? How do they get tiny little crumbs all over places they didn’t even go near? Is it magic? Does the dog do it? Do the cookie particles move themselves? Seriously, what gives?

 I gave my toddler a cookie today. She took it in the living room. When I got into the living room to sit down there were crumbs on the chair, the floor and the back of the couch. She got cookie crumbs on the lampshade, that I’m pretty sure she never touched. 

She took it in the bedroom. There were crumbs on the floor the bed and on her favorite baby doll. She even managed to get crumbs on the remote. That she can’t even reach. Because it is high on her dresser.  So she either climbed up the dresser and I’m a terrible mother who doesn’t pay attention, or she threw her cookie crumbs up there. I mean, how in the heck did they get up there? I never saw her put them there. Her fingers can barely grab the top of the dresser. Ugh. Anywho…

She took the cookie into the bathroom. I obviously told her to get out of the bathroom.. but I had to clean up crumbs. They were on the floor and the side of the tub. Smashed into the rug, you name it. 

She took that same cookie into my room. She climbed on my bed and demanded the tv be put on. I got her off the bed and turned the tv on in the living room. Then guess what happened. Yup. I cleaned up cookie crumbs.  They were on the bed, the floor and on the desk. 

She ended up eating two more cookies. My life today was cookie crumbs. Also, when I went to get into bed tonight I had cookie crumbs in between the blankets.  She didn’t even get in between the blankets. 

Someone tell me how they do that! 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

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So as of this morning, I have 100 followers. I’m still processing. I basically had to keep myself from shrieking. I know, I know I’m an adult and it’s a blog but man am I excited! 

 When I started writing, I wasn’t really sure what I would write about. I wasn’t sure where to go, where to start, or if anybody would read my posts. I woke up one day and told myself ” Girl you need an outlet. Write!” And so Kuddos and Kiddos began. 

There are days when I stare at a blank page, waiting to be inspired. There are days when I am literally in the middle of “mommying” and  boom it hits me and I write. I enjoy sharing with everyone. 

Thank you so much to everyone who has read, commented and shared my posts. I’m so happy that people are enjoying my quirky posts about the real life that is motherhood. I am so excited to see where this journey takes me! I hope that everyone will continue to stop by! It can only get funnier from here right?

I have some advice for other newbie bloggers. Write. Don’t be afraid what people will think. Don’t wait. Do it now! Let it out! Let the words flow! Someone somewhere is going through the exact same thing and would LOVE to know that they are not alone! Write about what makes you happy, sad, angry. Tell us about your day! We are here and we are listening! Keep reading and sharing and writing! Ask questions if you don’t know something. There are so many supportive writers out there who are very willing to help you through!

Thank you so much WordPress bloggers for the amazing support. I can’t wait to see where this takes me! Check out my Facebook Page

Big Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

When I grow up I want to be a watermelon.

So this morning while waiting for the school bus, my 6 yr old and I had a conversation about when she was 3 years old.  I had asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up, and she told me a watermelon. Yes you read that correctly. She was striving for excellence and apparently that meant becoming a fruit. 

 I mean I laughed at the time, thinking that I’m pretty sure being a watermelon doesn’t pay very well. Also there’s the possibility of being eaten at a BBQ. The struggle is real. 

Now that she is bigger, I’m thankful that her answer was not the same. I mean, I know she is six, but if she still thought that being a watermelon was in the realm of possibilities as an adult then I’m doing my job as mother extremely wrong. Or am I? I mean watermelons don’t have to do dishes. That’s a plus. Maybe I should have been a watermelon…

Well anyways, this morning I asked her the same question. What do you want to be when you grow up? She answered ” a pet vet”. So she wants to work with animals. She has always been a lover of animals. I’m not a cat person but I’m pretty sure every stray in the neighborhood has been named and is secretly fed by my daughter. That explains why they come back all the time. 

I also think her answer is adorable. She could have said ” a veterinarian” but “pet vet”is much cuter. I’m pretty happy with her answer. My daughter has the biggest, softest, heart ever. She is so kind hearted. I hope she gets to be a ‘pet vet’. I could definitely support that as a career! Much better than a watermelon! 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

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Sure I sit all day.. that’s what SAHM’s do. 

So there a lot of hype about being a stay at home mom. We are over worked, under paid, and sometimes we give off the impression that we really don’t do a whole lot of nothing. So I decided to share my day with everyone. Hope we can clear up some of the confusion. (So for this post I’ve decided to use “boom”  and “bang” for the girls names. It will be easier to keep them apart. Boom is my 6 year old. Bang is my 2 year. Fitting isn’t it? Haha)

7:35am –  woke up getting smacked in the forehead by Bang. “Mama!” Yes I’m up. It has to be like 9 right? Nope. 7:30. Fantastic. 

7:45 am – Changed Bang’s diaper. Cleaned up 57 baby wipes off the floor that she pulled out of the package. Took pen out of her hand. Where did that even come from? Ugh. Put Bang on potty. Nothing. 

8:15 am – Boom is up. And she’s STARVING. Here comes breakfast… Eggos count as breakfast right? Got toaster out. Dropped butter in the floor. Cleaned up butter. Put waffles in toaster. I need caffeine.

8:24am – Sitting down to eat waffles. Boom needs a drink. Getting up to get drink. Bang dropped her plate in the floor. Need to make more waffles. Gave her my waffles. Gave up making me waffles. Started dishes. Put Bang back on potty. Nothing. New diaper. 

9:15 am – Cleaned up Tupperware lids that Bang got out and threw in the floor. Turned on the tv for the girls. Started laundry. Folded clean laundry. Took pen away from Bang. Where does she keep getting those?! Cleaned ink off the table and couch with hairspray. Put Bang on potty. Still nothing. Finished folding laundry and put away clothes. Got Bang and Boom dressed. Cleaned toothpaste off the wall in bathroom.. Added hairspray to shopping list. Sat down. Dog needs to go out. Let the dog out. Let the dogs in. Check on Bang. Put clothes back into her dresser drawers she pulled out. Made her bed. Put Bang on Potty, again nothing. 

11:30 am – Made lunch. Sat down to eat. I actually sat the whole time. About twenty mins. This must be where the all day comes from? 

Noon – Cleaned up lunch mess. Got Boom a drink. Wiped up milk in floor. Mopped kitchen floor. Got Bang another drink.  While in the fridge, Bang knocked over the mop bucket. Sigh.  Cleaned up mop water with towels. Put Bang on Potty. NOTHING. Ugh. 

1pm – Naptime. Put Bang in bed. Got her a drink. Changed her diaper. Left the room. Turned on the tv. Sat down. Here comes Bang. Take Bang back in her room. Lay down next to her. Getting kicked in the head. She refuses to nap. Get up get her another drink. She’s back in the floor playing with toys. Give up on nap. 

2:30pm – Get crayons out for the girls. Set them up at the table. Do more laundry. Clean 50 crayons off the floor. Wipe crayon off the table. Hang up artwork. Wipe up spilled drink. Take pen away from Bang. Throw stinking pen in trash can. Clean up ink of wall and table. Let the dogs back out. Put Bang on the potty. You know what happens.. Start prepping for dinner.

3:30pm – Start peeling potatoes. Break up a fight between Bang and Boom. Put Boom in time out for hitting her sister. Play in the floor with Bang and some blocks. Sneak away to finish potatoes. Let Boom out of time out. Listen to a very nice song Boom wrote in her head while in timeout.  Start prepping everything else. What does she have now? Toilet paper. Fantastic. Clean up toilet paper all over the house. Take shoe out of dogs mouth. Scold dog. Scold Boom for not putting her shoe away. Go back in kitchen to check dinner. Put Bang on Potty. Laugh when she says no. Take Bang off potty. Give up on potty. 

5 pm – Dinner is done. Fix the girls plates. Hubby is home. Another drink is spilled in the rush to daddy. Clean up mess. Sit the girls down to eat. Listen to Boom complain about green beans. Laugh at Bang for the mashed potatoes on her nose. Sit down. Eat. Clean up the girls. Clean up the table. Do dishes. Soak pots. Because I want something else to do tomorrow. 

6pm – Bang isn’t wearing a diaper.  Where is the diaper? Please tell me there no poo. Crap. There’s poo.  Put Bang in the bath tub. Put Boom in the bathtub. Clean water off the floor. Listen to Bang cry when it’s time to get out. Get their PJs on. Chase Bang around brushing her hair. Cleaned the floor where diaper explosion happened. Mop and bleach floor. Call to hubby to let dogs out. 

8pm – Bedtime. Tell Boom and Bang it’s bedtime. Insert imaginary ear plugs while Boom complains it’s bedtime. Tuck her into bed. Leave her room. Pick up toys in living room. Tuck Bang into her bed. Stand in middle of the living room forgetting something. Laundry. Fold more laundry. Put Bang back in her bed. Listen to her cries. 

9:30pm – sit down. Play game on cell phone. Pause game. Put Bang back in bed. Get her more drink. Sit down and play game. Get bored of game. Write this blog post. Stop in middle and put Bang in my bed. Bang is sleeping. Woo. 

10:30pm – eat ice cream.  Go to bed. Tomorrow will be fun. Haha. 

That’s a normal day for me. Share your normal and not normal with me! We mom’s have to stick together! 

Hugs! Kuddos and Kiddos

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photo credit: Matthew Paul Argall <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/79157069@N03/30759511976″>Pink flowers and a mess of tree branches</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

The Bedtime Fight, Getting my Toddler in her own Bed.

So I’ve been trying to get my tiny kiddo to sleep in her own bed for months. I swore when she was an infant that she would sleep in her own bed and not co-sleep with us but that was a flop. She was in her crib until she was old enough to figure out mom and dad’s bed was better. I mean who wouldn’t want to snuggle with us? We are awesome. But still, it has been a constant battle to get her back into her own room for bed. 

Last night I caved and let her sleep with me. Which puts dad on the couch. We want to try and be as safe as possible when it comes to co-sleeping with our toddler. Also, my hubby isn’t amused by being kicked in the kidney at 3 am and my toddler and I are bed hogs. Yes I said it. I totally admit that the blanket is mine. I call dibs. Snooze you lose.

Tonight I have actually mastered the bedtime rituals. No matter how many times she has come out of her bedroom, I have put her back. I’ve changed her diaper, gave her new drinks, turned on the tv, turned the light back off a million times and have tucked her and all 100 baby dolls in. I have firmly told her go to bed when she comes into the living room to play. I’ve ignored her sneaking out of bed and playing with toys in the dark floor. 

She gets all excited when daddy comes in her room to put her back to bed. It’s almost pointless to let him try. She screams with delight ” Daddy! ” Then he has to explain to her it’s bedtime all over. He filled her cup, turned on her nightlight, told her good night, asked her to lay down and left the room. She gets up before he leaves the hallway and gets down to play with toys. 

She even got up and closed the door to her room. Apparently she thinks that when she does this, I won’t notice the extremely loud toy being dragged across the floor to the light switch. Or the light glowing from under the door, and that I will let her just stay playing. We seriously have a tiny genius on our hands.  She even went as far as pretending to close her eyes when I came into the room, even though she was standing in the middle. Also, she can’t close her eyes very well either, but she doesn’t know that. 

After about two hours of fighting with her and cleaning up messes and listening to her cry. She’s asleep. In her bed. Now I know that in about an hour she will be in my bed anyways. But I’ll take this as a win. She fell asleep in her bed! Woo! Go us! Maybe tomorrow we can make it without all the chaos. 

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Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

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