Noises, Bugs and Nightmares

It’s 4am. I’m awake for the 4th night in a row because my almost 7 year old is all of a sudden terrified of literally everything. 

She won’t sleep all night. She won’t sleep without a light (and we talking something bright enough to see from space). She won’t play outside for fear of blood sucking bugs, even though she has known about mosquitoes now for awhile. It’s insane. Every little thing terrifies her. She is scared of the toad that creeps onto the porch at night. She is afraid that it’s too dark. She worried about dragons, monsters and people breaking in. She worried that a cougar will eat her in the yard after dark. Won’t walk near the woods because who knows what’s hiding.

She hears noises at random times in the night and goes into panic mode. She will wake up crying and run into our bedroom and after an hour or so of convincing her that there is no such thing as the big bad wolf with overalls, she finally goes back to sleep. 

Unfortunately, these interrupted nights of sleep are making it worse. She’s so tired when she gets up in the night. She ends up being very cranky by lunch and then it’s a struggle to get through the day. I’ve had to curb what she watches, what video games she plays, where she goes and who she hangs out with. 

My daughter has always kind of had a soft heart and been a little on the sensitive side, but I need my 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep. She needs her 10 hours of sleep. Her Daddy needs his sleep and so does her sister.

So what is a Mom to do?  Do I wrap her in bubble wrap? Teach her to use a sword to scare away imaginary beings? Should I get Daddy to post up in her bedroom at night with a shotgun? No. No I shouldn’t. 

I can’t baby her. I’m just not that kind of Mom. It’s not fair, but at 4am after tucking her back in and arguing with her repeatedly about whether or not she heard something, I’m running out of patience. I try to be understanding, and loving but sometimes her outbursts are so dramatic that it wakes up everyone in the house. Once the toddler is awake and her Dad is up, she magically isn’t scared anymore and goes back to bed. It’s almost too perfect.

I understand that my little bundle of joy is going through a phase. It’s an exhausting, ridiculous mess of a phase… But a phase non-the-less. The only thing I can do is hug her, wipe her eyes and reassure her that I will protect her from all of the things she is scared of. Except spiders… That’s totally up to her Dad.

Finally after many weeks now of fighting off imaginary monsters, I made her clean all the stuff in her room. We dumped out toy boxes, moved curtains, cleaned the closet. Looking ever so intently for “scary things”. We searched for spiders, found one and smashed that sucker. We searched for other bugs, nothing. Searched for monsters, nothing (except the creepy baby doll she had in the bottom of her toy box.. but I suppose only I was fearful of it). We even pulled and pushed on her window to show her how hard it was to open. Explained to her that unless she got up in the middle of the night and let the scary things in on her own, that there was no way something was getting in. 

So after not finding a single thing, my daughter suddenly and almost magically realized that there was nothing that can harm her in her bedroom. No dragons or rabid racoons. No big bad wolf or slithering snakes. She went to bed last night with minimal complaint. She only woke in the night twice and when told to go back to bed didn’t even make a sound. 

Hopefully we are on the way to a peaceful night’s sleep around here. This Mama is running on fumes!

Hugs! -Kristy aka Mama Kuddo

photo credit: Alyssa L. Miller <a href=”″>The Safety of Fear</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

Sit Down and Shut It Up: Parents Who Talk Bad About Parents. 

I don’t understand what the problem is. If our kiddos are clean, fed, and cared for that’s what matters right? So why do we keep putting other parents down for things? Why do we take it upon ourselves to be total judge mental tards? Yup that’s what I said, tards. Better than what I was thinking. 
I’m so tired of hearing about what this parent or that parent did or didn’t do. Most of the time, it’s from someone who IS a parent. Now I know darn well that you have been through tough parenting moments. Hence the word ‘parent’.

I know that you have been up every hour on the hour, comforting a sick child. I know that you have had a toddler who will only eat the jelly off their bread, instead of the whole dang sandwich like a normal person. Or have a child ask for a banana only to throw it in the floor. Or eat two bites of their food and ask for a snack. This list of food examples could get intense. I’ll end it here…

I know that you, a parent, of children, have had to physically hold down your child to get boogers out of their nose. You have turned your head for five seconds and your child has wrote on the wall… In their own poo. If that’s something that has only happened to me I’m disappointed. Seriously. 

I know that you have fought your kiddos for an hour to get them to go to bed at night. Listened to their whiney cries when they don’t get a nap. Fought with them over a candy bar at the grocery store. Let go of their hand in the parking lot to get your keys out of your purse, only to have a heart attack when they almost get hit by a car. Let go of your child at the zoo and freaked the hell out because he disappeared around the corner while you were looking at the penguins with the other kids. Come on those little buggers are adorable..

I know that you have put Band-Aids on imaginary boo boos.  Played tea party with a child who won’t let you look at her stuffed bear. I know that you have screamed at your child for nothing except that whatever you told them to do, they didn’t do, and probably didn’t need to be yelled at like that but OMG JUST LISTEN. I know that you have ate all the rest of the candy so the kids couldn’t. Guilty as charged. 

I know that you have tried teaching them how to use the potty, only to fail. Currently going on at my house. I know that you have dropped an entire gallon of milk on the floor, had to get in your vehicle and go to the store, at midnight, all while your child screams bloody murder in the back seat because they want milk. (True story)

I know that you have cleaned, repeatedly. Everyday. For hours. I know that the laundry is never done. The dishes are always dirty and the house is always messy. I know that you are EXHAUSTED. So why in the hell do I always hear things about “bad moms” or “terrible dads” from people who are parents?

If you SHOW UP day in and day out. If you try your very best to do every single thing in your power to ensure the healthy, positive growth of your children, even when you might make a mistake… Then shut the hell up. Yup. Shut it up. 

You have no right to judge another parent. 

1. Not your business. 

2. Not your business. 

3. You are literally going through or have gone through the same things that they are. 

4. Not your business. 

And if you DON’T show up. If you don’t TRY. If you aren’t there. Then you don’t have the right to judge a parent who does. So shut up. Sit down. Step aside. 

Because parents, real ones, we know what the day to day is about. We show up. We put our big, grown up britches on and we laugh at the mistakes and we learn from them. So stop putting all the other parents down. You have no idea what they might be going through. Or what toddler, pre-teen or teenager they have to hide from. 

If parenting was easy there would be a book. Being a parent, I know there isn’t a step by step guide book. Trust me I checked. 

-Kuddos and Kiddos

Take care of yourself!

I have been sitting here in my quiet house, on a Friday night for an hour now.  Husband is working late. The tv is playing but I’m not really watching. I’m sewing on my machine​. Listening to the thunderstorms and enjoying the quiet. These nights come so few but I can’t help wishing I had something exciting to do. I’m bored of the same old “mom life” stuff. The laundry, the dishes, the cleaning, and the fighting with tiny humans to go to bed. I love to sew, and it’s relaxing but I’m burnt out on the repitition that is my life. Everyday, same old stuff. 

Since when did being a mom, mean not being able to have some fun? Since when does that mean that we are automatically home on the weekends and can’t let our hair down? It doesn’t. I want fun, romance, and adult conversation. I want hot dinner I don’t have to clean up and a movie that isn’t interupted by fighting kiddos. Hell, I’d settle for a long hot shower without children banging on the door. 

I can’t tell you the last time that I went to a store and bought something special for myself. I can tell you what I bought my girls, my husband, but not me. I’m sure there are moms that relate. I can’t remember the last time I went on a date with my husband. There used to be so many dinners and movies. Now it’s like we use the “we have kids” excuse too much. We do have kids, but that doesn’t mean we can’t go to dinner. It doesn’t mean that we can’t make time to keep the spark in our relationship lit. 

You can’t take care of your children, unless you take care of yourself. You can’t. So when you need a minute… Call up a friend, go to movie, go buy a milkshake. Find the time to take care of yourself. Kiss your husband, go to dinner and find time! Its important to not get “bored” or “burnt out”. I can’t be the best mom I can be without taking moments for myself to breathe and reflect on the stuff going on in my life. 

So tonight I’m going to enjoy this quiet house and this glass of wine. But tomorrow.. tomorrow my husband is taking me out for steak. He doesn’t know yet, so let’s not ruin the suprise! 

Hugs! -Kuddos and Kiddos

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photo credit: Derek Keats <a href=”″>Ligntning over Johannesburg, South Africa.</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

When I grow up I want to be a watermelon.

So this morning while waiting for the school bus, my 6 yr old and I had a conversation about when she was 3 years old.  I had asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up, and she told me a watermelon. Yes you read that correctly. She was striving for excellence and apparently that meant becoming a fruit. 

 I mean I laughed at the time, thinking that I’m pretty sure being a watermelon doesn’t pay very well. Also there’s the possibility of being eaten at a BBQ. The struggle is real. 

Now that she is bigger, I’m thankful that her answer was not the same. I mean, I know she is six, but if she still thought that being a watermelon was in the realm of possibilities as an adult then I’m doing my job as mother extremely wrong. Or am I? I mean watermelons don’t have to do dishes. That’s a plus. Maybe I should have been a watermelon…

Well anyways, this morning I asked her the same question. What do you want to be when you grow up? She answered ” a pet vet”. So she wants to work with animals. She has always been a lover of animals. I’m not a cat person but I’m pretty sure every stray in the neighborhood has been named and is secretly fed by my daughter. That explains why they come back all the time. 

I also think her answer is adorable. She could have said ” a veterinarian” but “pet vet”is much cuter. I’m pretty happy with her answer. My daughter has the biggest, softest, heart ever. She is so kind hearted. I hope she gets to be a ‘pet vet’. I could definitely support that as a career! Much better than a watermelon! 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

photo credit: wayneandwax <a href=”″>september-2016-85</a&gt; via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

Sure I sit all day.. that’s what SAHM’s do. 

So there a lot of hype about being a stay at home mom. We are over worked, under paid, and sometimes we give off the impression that we really don’t do a whole lot of nothing. So I decided to share my day with everyone. Hope we can clear up some of the confusion. (So for this post I’ve decided to use “boom”  and “bang” for the girls names. It will be easier to keep them apart. Boom is my 6 year old. Bang is my 2 year. Fitting isn’t it? Haha)

7:35am –  woke up getting smacked in the forehead by Bang. “Mama!” Yes I’m up. It has to be like 9 right? Nope. 7:30. Fantastic. 

7:45 am – Changed Bang’s diaper. Cleaned up 57 baby wipes off the floor that she pulled out of the package. Took pen out of her hand. Where did that even come from? Ugh. Put Bang on potty. Nothing. 

8:15 am – Boom is up. And she’s STARVING. Here comes breakfast… Eggos count as breakfast right? Got toaster out. Dropped butter in the floor. Cleaned up butter. Put waffles in toaster. I need caffeine.

8:24am – Sitting down to eat waffles. Boom needs a drink. Getting up to get drink. Bang dropped her plate in the floor. Need to make more waffles. Gave her my waffles. Gave up making me waffles. Started dishes. Put Bang back on potty. Nothing. New diaper. 

9:15 am – Cleaned up Tupperware lids that Bang got out and threw in the floor. Turned on the tv for the girls. Started laundry. Folded clean laundry. Took pen away from Bang. Where does she keep getting those?! Cleaned ink off the table and couch with hairspray. Put Bang on potty. Still nothing. Finished folding laundry and put away clothes. Got Bang and Boom dressed. Cleaned toothpaste off the wall in bathroom.. Added hairspray to shopping list. Sat down. Dog needs to go out. Let the dog out. Let the dogs in. Check on Bang. Put clothes back into her dresser drawers she pulled out. Made her bed. Put Bang on Potty, again nothing. 

11:30 am – Made lunch. Sat down to eat. I actually sat the whole time. About twenty mins. This must be where the all day comes from? 

Noon – Cleaned up lunch mess. Got Boom a drink. Wiped up milk in floor. Mopped kitchen floor. Got Bang another drink.  While in the fridge, Bang knocked over the mop bucket. Sigh.  Cleaned up mop water with towels. Put Bang on Potty. NOTHING. Ugh. 

1pm – Naptime. Put Bang in bed. Got her a drink. Changed her diaper. Left the room. Turned on the tv. Sat down. Here comes Bang. Take Bang back in her room. Lay down next to her. Getting kicked in the head. She refuses to nap. Get up get her another drink. She’s back in the floor playing with toys. Give up on nap. 

2:30pm – Get crayons out for the girls. Set them up at the table. Do more laundry. Clean 50 crayons off the floor. Wipe crayon off the table. Hang up artwork. Wipe up spilled drink. Take pen away from Bang. Throw stinking pen in trash can. Clean up ink of wall and table. Let the dogs back out. Put Bang on the potty. You know what happens.. Start prepping for dinner.

3:30pm – Start peeling potatoes. Break up a fight between Bang and Boom. Put Boom in time out for hitting her sister. Play in the floor with Bang and some blocks. Sneak away to finish potatoes. Let Boom out of time out. Listen to a very nice song Boom wrote in her head while in timeout.  Start prepping everything else. What does she have now? Toilet paper. Fantastic. Clean up toilet paper all over the house. Take shoe out of dogs mouth. Scold dog. Scold Boom for not putting her shoe away. Go back in kitchen to check dinner. Put Bang on Potty. Laugh when she says no. Take Bang off potty. Give up on potty. 

5 pm – Dinner is done. Fix the girls plates. Hubby is home. Another drink is spilled in the rush to daddy. Clean up mess. Sit the girls down to eat. Listen to Boom complain about green beans. Laugh at Bang for the mashed potatoes on her nose. Sit down. Eat. Clean up the girls. Clean up the table. Do dishes. Soak pots. Because I want something else to do tomorrow. 

6pm – Bang isn’t wearing a diaper.  Where is the diaper? Please tell me there no poo. Crap. There’s poo.  Put Bang in the bath tub. Put Boom in the bathtub. Clean water off the floor. Listen to Bang cry when it’s time to get out. Get their PJs on. Chase Bang around brushing her hair. Cleaned the floor where diaper explosion happened. Mop and bleach floor. Call to hubby to let dogs out. 

8pm – Bedtime. Tell Boom and Bang it’s bedtime. Insert imaginary ear plugs while Boom complains it’s bedtime. Tuck her into bed. Leave her room. Pick up toys in living room. Tuck Bang into her bed. Stand in middle of the living room forgetting something. Laundry. Fold more laundry. Put Bang back in her bed. Listen to her cries. 

9:30pm – sit down. Play game on cell phone. Pause game. Put Bang back in bed. Get her more drink. Sit down and play game. Get bored of game. Write this blog post. Stop in middle and put Bang in my bed. Bang is sleeping. Woo. 

10:30pm – eat ice cream.  Go to bed. Tomorrow will be fun. Haha. 

That’s a normal day for me. Share your normal and not normal with me! We mom’s have to stick together! 

Hugs! Kuddos and Kiddos

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photo credit: Matthew Paul Argall <a href=”″>Pink flowers and a mess of tree branches</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

The Bedtime Fight, Getting my Toddler in her own Bed.

So I’ve been trying to get my tiny kiddo to sleep in her own bed for months. I swore when she was an infant that she would sleep in her own bed and not co-sleep with us but that was a flop. She was in her crib until she was old enough to figure out mom and dad’s bed was better. I mean who wouldn’t want to snuggle with us? We are awesome. But still, it has been a constant battle to get her back into her own room for bed. 

Last night I caved and let her sleep with me. Which puts dad on the couch. We want to try and be as safe as possible when it comes to co-sleeping with our toddler. Also, my hubby isn’t amused by being kicked in the kidney at 3 am and my toddler and I are bed hogs. Yes I said it. I totally admit that the blanket is mine. I call dibs. Snooze you lose.

Tonight I have actually mastered the bedtime rituals. No matter how many times she has come out of her bedroom, I have put her back. I’ve changed her diaper, gave her new drinks, turned on the tv, turned the light back off a million times and have tucked her and all 100 baby dolls in. I have firmly told her go to bed when she comes into the living room to play. I’ve ignored her sneaking out of bed and playing with toys in the dark floor. 

She gets all excited when daddy comes in her room to put her back to bed. It’s almost pointless to let him try. She screams with delight ” Daddy! ” Then he has to explain to her it’s bedtime all over. He filled her cup, turned on her nightlight, told her good night, asked her to lay down and left the room. She gets up before he leaves the hallway and gets down to play with toys. 

She even got up and closed the door to her room. Apparently she thinks that when she does this, I won’t notice the extremely loud toy being dragged across the floor to the light switch. Or the light glowing from under the door, and that I will let her just stay playing. We seriously have a tiny genius on our hands.  She even went as far as pretending to close her eyes when I came into the room, even though she was standing in the middle. Also, she can’t close her eyes very well either, but she doesn’t know that. 

After about two hours of fighting with her and cleaning up messes and listening to her cry. She’s asleep. In her bed. Now I know that in about an hour she will be in my bed anyways. But I’ll take this as a win. She fell asleep in her bed! Woo! Go us! Maybe tomorrow we can make it without all the chaos. 

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Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

photo credit: jialiangwong <a href=”″>What would you do if you have a heavy snorer in the house/room? #snoring #sleepingwithsirens #JL_100doodles (36/100)</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

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Why I won’t go out at Naptime.

So when I became a mom, I figured out that naptime was like, the best thing ever. I mean seriously, if you haven’t enjoyed the time your kiddos are napping to the fullest you are missing out. Next to their sweet smiles and angelic kisses it’s my second favorite part of the day. 

A lot of times I get asked to do something in the middle of naptime. I always say I’m busy. Everytime. And if I’m out around town I try to be home just in time for naptime. I don’t find pleasure in skipping naps. I just won’t do it. And here’s 5 reasons why…

1. My baby is growing.  She is a growing girl. Science somewhere on some website or in some book proves that growing babies need their sleep. She’s growing up and soon I won’t be able to enjoy the peaceful silence that is naptime because she will be too old to take naps. So no sorry I won’t be able to go to lunch today.  

2. Melt Downs. I don’t know about you guys but NOBODY wants to stand in the middle of the grocery store check out with a screaming child. Nobody. And if my little angel doesn’t get her nap, boy does she get angry. So I’m not at all interested in being in the middle of store with you when my kiddos decides to go cray cray. Nope. 

3. Dinner time chaos. If my little kiddo is tired and cranky from not getting her nap, I will have a permanently attached monster on my leg while I cook dinner. I will have to listen to her whine and screaming because I’m not holding her, while I’m peeling potatoes. It will not be pleasant. I am not interested. Rain check?

4. Goodbye bedtime, goodbye morning routine. If she skips her nap..Watch out because she will get her second wind right after dinner. She will be soooo full of energy. She will be giggling like crazy. Wanting more drink, playing with her toes, and whatever else she can find. Then when it’s time to go to sleep, it will be well before the normal time she is supposed too. She will wake up in the morning way too early and the following days nap will also be screwed up. So again, no thank you, we will have to go to the park at another time.

And last but not least.. 

5. I don’t want to.  I just don’t. Yes I would love to leave in the middle of the day and meet you anywhere you want and engage in adult conversation. There’s only so much Dora can talk to me about. But I just don’t want to give up that 30 mins or hour that I get to eat cookies without sharing. I won’t give up my shower, my time to do dishes, or my sanity. So no thank you. But maybe we can do breakfast? 

Hugs! – Kuddos and Kiddos

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